Dragon-Hoards and Caves of Ice

A few days ago, when we all looked down from our paper-line balcony at work, the machine operators had amassed a vast pile of flattened aluminum cans. It was perhaps a dozen feet high, thirty feet across, and the cans were all of different colors. We were seeing it from above and at some distance. Away across the floor of Greenstar’s grand central cavern, it looked a lot like a pile of treasure, precious gems all a-glitter — a dragon’s hoard!

So we’ve come through a week of winter’s deep-freeze here in Pittsburgh. For a few days, temperatures were down in the teens (before wind chill); then it warmed up just enough to make snow possible. So we received a few more inches of that. There were cancellations and early school dismissals right and left.

“How cold was it?” you ask. Well, since the opening of the new break room at work, which is beside the front entrance gate, I’ve been leaving my lunch in my car; I pick it up there on the way to lunch break. This past week, my mini-carrots were all frozen by lunch time.

Also, when we take breaks, we typically leave our gloves on the handles of our trash bins up on the line. I came back after the fifteen-minute break on that first really cold day, and my reinforced outer gloves were stiff. I could hardly bend the fingers!

So, as you can imagine, I’ve been bundling up. I went to a thrift store and bought a heavy secondhand coat that can get as dirty as it wants to. I wear my seven layers with that on top as the eighth (I know this sounds like a fairy tale) — and Carol at Triad (my staffing agency) found me a bigger safety vest that will fit over all that. My summer bandana is now a knit hat, which the hardhat fits over. I’m wearing the insulated overalls I bought back in Taylorville. It’s frustrating how wearing all that cuts down on mobility. It’s a lot harder to bend to the floor to pick things up, and with stiff gloves, I can’t do nearly the fine snatching on the line that I could in warmer times. I think the plant should just shut down until a more reasonable season.

The authorities of Greenstar, though, have been quite decent and humane toward us workers. On the coldest days, they extended our break times a little, so that we could spend more time in the heated trailer. One day they ordered us pizzas for lunch! And they’ve let us know that, if we get too cold on the line, we can go down to the trailer one by one and warm up for ten minutes. I haven’t had to resort to that yet, but some of the guys do. Also, the bosses sometimes give out hand-warmers, those chemical baggies that emit heat when exposed to air. Having those inside the gloves helps a little, as does shoving some down into the toes of our boots. We stand on scraps of rug; we stand on pieces of cardboard if we have no rugs. Gizmo taught me the technique of nylon dress socks: wear a pair of those under two pairs of regular socks, and the toes don’t get quite as cold.

I had the privilege of substitute teaching once more on Thursday this past week, this time for a three-hour intensive writing class at the other school, the Community College of Allegheny County. I had even more fun with this class!

Okay, then . . . nothing spectacular this time around . . . just letting you all know I’m still here, still thrashing.

 

12 Responses to Dragon-Hoards and Caves of Ice

  1. Hagiograph says:

    Your description of a pile of flattened cans about 12′ high by 30′ across should, if I did the trig right, work out to a 39degree “angle of repose” for the flattened cans. [arctangent(12/15)]. I wonder if that is what one would expect for flat “particles” like that.

    Angle of repose is not just a function of particle shape but also size and a variety of other factors.

    For something as large as a flattened aluminum can I wonder if that angle of repose is normal.

    Interesting….

    On the other hand: I love the cold, but as I’ve noted earlier it is good to be working to stay warm while it is cold as opposed to trying to stay cool when it is hot. I don’t envy you working outside all day in the cold. But I still prefer the cold.

  2. jhagman says:

    Hagio is a scientist- he’ll genetically modify his soldier rats to grow heavy coats when it gets cold. Then he’ll equip them with minature blasters. We are doomed,,,,help us James Bond!!

    • Morwenna says:

      The truth is out. He’s not working on coating high-gloss paper (although the rats’ super-thick fur coats may be shiny). We do need 007!

      • Hagiograph says:

        You ARE all doomed! My shiny coated rat army will all speak FRENCH TOO!

        Last week I did a 23 hour shift at the printers and we actually go complete “bound books” out of the process. For those who haven’t seen paperbacks made it is FUN! I assume the lines are similar for offset machines but the Mueller-Martini Book Line I was at was waaay cool!

        And nearby was a big ol’ bin full of books that hadn’t quite made the cut quality-wise (and some were literally cut at bizarre angles from the giant cutters which can cut through hundreds of pages of of books in a flash).

        I ran across a book that, based on my incredibly poor French skills appeared to be a Sci-Fi book for younger folks that appeared to be simply awful! Something about the part of the year you were born in in this dystopian future indicated if you could ultimately get a job when you grew up. And it also included a “rebellious rock band” of some sort. I trudged through one page and could eke out something about synthesizer players, guitarists and the singer. I could definitely pick up the vibe of “these people are cool!”

        Oh it just looked awful. But I could be wrong. My French is predicated on being able to interpolate the words based on Spanish and common linguistic sense, so maybe this was one of the greatest Sci-Fi books ever written!

        Needless to say my Francophone Cold-Adapted Laser-equipped Rat Army will first attack Brown Snowflake (for his scurrilous attacks on the French!) and then will move on to take over the world!!!!

        Oh, almost forgot:
        bwahahahahahahaha.

        PS: On the flight back I caught part of a ‘TopGear’ special episode where Richard Hammond discussed the various Bond cars. It had some hilarious parts like an “invisibility shield” they built for Ford van. Priceless.

  3. I shall prepare for the oncoming wave of vermin by wickedly poisoning huge, smelly chunks of brie and setting them aside poison-laced shallow dishes of a cheap Bourdeaux while piping Edith Piaf ballads through the loudspeakers.

    • Hagiograph says:

      I looked for Edith Piaf’s grave at Pere Lachaise but couldn’t find it! It was on the map but I couldn’t locate it.

      I can only assume SHE IS NOW PART OF THE PARISIAN ZOMBIE ARMY I spoke of in the last blog comments section.

      Here’s you newly updated NIGHTMARE LIST:

      1. Parisian Zombie Army from the Catacombs (former Catholic bodies now enslaved to the Muslim command)

      2. Shiny coated, Laser-weilding French Rat Army intent on killing you.

      3. Lead by GENERAL ZOMBIE EDITH PIAF, “The Butcher of Belleville” (as she will soon be known)

      4. All of them reading bad sci-fi!

      Cry havoc and let slip les chiens de guerre!

      • Binsers says:

        Pere LaChaise is one of my favorita places on the planet. I have an entire scrapbook filled with just photos from the great cemeteries in Paris, and yes, I have Edith Piaf’s. If I recall correctly, it is a flat one and the name is on the flat top, which means you would be looking down not straight ahead. I am out of town or I would run down, look at the photo and give you a better description!

  4. Lizzie says:

    I’m posting here so as not to sully your engagement post *EEEEE!*, the primary reason I came in tonight was to tell you about a series I’ve stumbled across that might just be very inspirational for your writing.

    It’s called “Cities of the Underworld” and is produced by the History Channel. Basically, a team of historians go all over the world and explore beneath the world’s greatest cities- whether it’s ancient ruins, or portions of the cities that were just build over, catacombs, or shelters build during the wars.

    It’s fascinating.

    I found the first three seasons through my local library- perhaps yours has access to it as well, if not, you might check Netflix- I hope you do find copies, because, WOW.

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